Get out of my inbox!

So Mothers’ Day is fast approaching.  I wasn’t quite prepared for just how much any mention of it would upset me.  It’s nearly five months since Mum passed away.  I’ve just about stopped crying every day, but there’s not a day goes by when I don’t feel deeply, deeply sad at some point.

The email barrage by companies selling cards and gifts has been relentless.  Our military could probably learn a few tactics for wearing down the enemy from the likes of Thorntons and Interflora.  With most, it’s a simple matter of clicking unsubscribe and the torrent will cease.  Moonpig.com on the other hand cannot let it lie.

I lost my rag, just a little bit, with them today.  My reply to their ‘newsletter’ pretty much explains why.

“My Mum died in October. You've emailed me 3 times in 5 days to 'remind' me to send her a card and flowers. As if I could forget. I've unsubscribed from your newsletters, but I see that if I use Moonpig again, I will continue to receive them. I logged in to my account to specify settings and noted that the check boxes for Mothers' Day and Fathers' Day are greyed out and I can't uncheck them. So no matter what I do I'm going to continue receiving these emails? My dad died in 1998 incidentally. If I can only unsubscribe from painful reminders by not using Moonpig again, well, I suppose the choice is clear. Your competitors haven't spammed my inbox at all.”

Harsh?  Not their fault?  Well I beg to differ.  It might not be the fault of the poor sod who receives responses to newsletters.  I know just how it feels to explain to a customer that I’m very sorry but the data extract for the mailing list took place before they clicked unsubscribe.  The point is that they clicked unsubscribe and they will be in no further extracts.  Moonpig don’t allow you to do that.  You can click the link by all means, and you’re told that it may take up to three weeks for emails to stop.  Three weeks is ok.  If, however, you deign to buy another card or gift from them, whether you’ve unsubscribed or not, you’ll be back to square one and another three weeks.  I’m an educated person, but the only way I can think to sum this up is quite simply “it sucks”.

When you work out the averages, 3 emails in 5 days means within the next three weeks I can expect another dozen newsletters.  That’s assuming they don’t become daily occurrences before Mothers’ Day, or worse morning and evening.

It’s not the emails that really got my goat.  It’s the subscription policy.  So I thought I’d illustrate to them just how unwelcome the practise is.  Not that they’re going to change their ways just because I replied.  But I thought about every person who’s lost a parent recently and also bought a card from them getting these pink and fluffy emails without warning or recourse and I just couldn’t keep my mouth shut.  Well, my mouth was firmly shut with teeth clenched, but you know what I mean.

The marketers think they have the right to invade our lives no matter what is happening there, and I’m a teensy weensy bit sick.  That’s teensy weensy in the same was as Godzilla is a house pet.